when I submitted this poem to the magazine, I received the following reply:
Unfortunately we are going to pass on your work. We don’t feel that it is quite the right fit for our A Portrait in Blues anthology. Good luck placing it elsewhere.
Platypus Press Editors
Rather, this poem contains all the blues’ features, only the message is not served on a plate. Pay attention to key words. It’s a poem about the separation of a (wo)man from the toxic environment and finding strength and meaning in their own being.
authors’ note: Rest assured my remark does not contain any hint of the petty conceit. Enjoy my poem.
I have found my face
It is beautiful…
to smile by the lake, to kneel before my image
Beside my one true lover
Who gazes upon my improved facial features
I touch them with my newborn newly lengthened arms
Recreating myself , but in my own image
what a magnificent creature I am
the pure form, offended by piss-poor perfection
I have no need for this damned society
Of humanity’s cretinous castaways,
now that I have found
my mad reflection
that gazes at what she cannot touch!
and one love
With this new love brought from Heaven to Earth
with this beautiful creation emerged from the freezing water
there will be no more Petrarchan Platonic patheticalness
no more dark clouds above my shoulders with the strong pungent smell of storm
there will be.. No!
no more waking life, no!
No more wounds in my back, no crying at night
I understand that love is essential
I am taking the silvered mirror
I am kissing the lips of God
I am having my first date.
3 thoughts on “The Birth Of Narcissus”
I think your poem is a wonderful piece. Whitney Houston was an amazing singer and this poem too is grand.
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Thanks for your kind words, Thoughts in Life. I’m not discouraged, but I do think that most of my literary works does not fit in today’s commercial market and require the attention of the audience that feels my specific style of writing. That is the gift which I will cherish the most.
Be who you are Leila. You are gifted yet talented writer. I am sure you will discover your audience all in due time. I do love your work with words.